oxyMORON
by LeilaLives
Summary: “You know that you’re basically a living oxymoron, right?” I looked at him with passive eyes. “Shut up” HitsuxOC
1. jumbo SHRIMP

**oxyMORON**

_**Chapter 1**_

_**jumbo**__** SHRIMP**_

**Lol. Another one guys, Hitsuxoc in case you don't know. I worked hard on this chapter so be nice. I love reviews by the way, they are awesome. The main character is Masako Yamagata. A 13 year old runner who is self absorbed at times and can make you feel bad by accident. And sometimes she might not even notice. Sounds a little bit like yours truly. Well Enjoy!**

* * *

_It's October again,_

_Leaves coming down,_

_One more year's come and gone,_

_And nothings changed at all,_

Masako hugged her knees close to her chest and heavily sighed. Tears crusted her cheeks and made her face feel heavy. Tree branches scraped her window, shadows created by the moonlight decorated the carpet of her room. The sound of chatter was heard from downstairs, her parents eating and talking happily while she lay in her room, her mind filled with thoughts of the day's events.

Her ears were filled with the noise of claws scraping skin, a tearing sound, and then a thump. And all the while, the girl was screaming, for anyone to save her, to help, and yet, no one came.

* * *

Masako smiled at the window, the colorful leaves were scattered around her lawn, colors of red, yellow, and orange in view. She could hardly see the green of the grass anymore. Not only because it was Autumn, but because it was 4:50 in the morning, the usual time she wakes up. 

She walked into the bathroom, her feet sticking to the floor from the remainder of summer heat. Masako jumped into the shower and let the warm water spray down her back and revel down her legs into the drain. She wasn't entirely awake, still in dream mode, so she walked out of the shower with no towel, and stood in front of the mirror. Her eyes were drooping and she could have probably slept on the tile.

She splashed cold water on her face and looked into the mirror, watching the water dripping down her milkmaid pale face. Masako grabbed a towel and dried her face, blotches of red appearing where she rubbed too hard.

"Damn" she muttered to herself. Bags were under her eyes and her lips were slim and light, hardly noticeable. Masako were not one for make-up, but this was ridiculous. She didn't even feel sick, and yet she looked like she was.

"It's probably from not eating regularly" She thought. But it wasn't for a bad reason, there was a track competition coming up and she had to be light on her feet.

Masako grabbed some concealer and lip gloss from her bureau and headed back into the bathroom. She applied some concealer under her eyes with her fingertips, and using a lip brush, applied some pink lip gloss on her lips. Masako brushed her short red hair and outlined her moss green eyes with black eyeliner. She traced her freckles, which were just sprinkled on her nose and upper cheek bones and smiled.

Having a mom that was a make-up artist taught her a lot of things. For one, make-up was everything to a woman. In her mother's words-

"Make-up is deception. Make-up is intellectual. Make-up is probably one of my favorite things in its ability to communicate all the archetypes of a woman."

Her mom, Aya, was ambitious and serious when it came to her job. Unlike her father, Kei, who was laidback and not as outgoing when it came to his job, which was being the owner of a business corporation in America. He was hardly ever home, and when he was, business was put aside completely.

Masako gripped her school uniform under her arm from way it laid on the "clean clothes bin" and walked out of the bathroom.

Masako was in 8th grade, and the uniform consisted of a short skirt and white button down shirt. A gray blazer on top of that was optional. Because of her short stature, and overall "tomboy-ness", Masako wore a pair of gray cargo pants that were tight on her skin, easy to run in, and reached her knees and a white button down shirt to school. It was much more comfortable than worrying if a guy was looking your skirt if you weren't sitting right.

She walked down the stairs of her house, her tennis shoes in one hand and book bag in the other, which contained her school uniform. She was currently wearing her gym uniform, a t-shirt and shorts. A granola bar was already waiting for her on the kitchen table.

"Morning'' Masako yelled to no one in particular. She heard replies in grunts and smiled.

"I guess I'm early, huh?" She was an early riser, so she could run more before going to school. It was her daily routine and the family still didn't seem used to it. She was an only child, but probably more hassle than a family with five.

"I'm leaving guys, see ya" She yelled running out the door. Her granola bar was safe in her bag, where she would eat it after the run. If she ate it now, she would just burn it off and digest it faster, which Masako didn't want to do.

She stopped after five blocks in front of a white house. A girl with long brown hair that was tied in a pony tail and her gym uniform was leaving the house, her usual grin plastered on her face.

"Hey Sako-chan" Masako nodded in greeting and ran ahead, ignoring the shouts from her friend, Shinju.

Shinju soon caught up, her forehead shining with perspiration. Masako sped up her pace, earning a whine from Shinju.

"Would you slow down, this isn't a race" Shinju shouted between pants. Masako stopped and waited for her friend, who was sprawled on the floor, rummaging her bag for a water bottle. Masako barely worked up a sweat, but faked a few pants for her friend and sat beside her.

"I know it's not a race, but I will be in one soon and I have to be in tip-top shape" She smacked her arm and grabbed her absent flab. This was the only way to convince Shinju to run more, even if it seemed ridiculous.

"This has to come off" Masako explained to a wide eyed Shinju.

"ARE YOU CRAZY" Shinju screamed. Masako quirked a perfectly shaped eyebrow at her, fake confusion evident on her face. A few people shouted from their window and a woman in her twenties with long strawberry blonde hair and crystal blue eyes glared at us from her doorstep.

"Some people need their beauty sleep" The woman said behind gritted teeth. Masako saw a boy with white hair and in blue striped pajamas stand behind her, rubbing his eyes, his mouth set in a snarl. He was kind of short, reminding her of a shrimp. _Cute_ she thought.

"She is the one who thinks she has an ounce of fat on her" Shinju was standing up, her arms out dramatically. Masako stood up, grabbed her bag and began to walk away, but the woman stepped in her path. She frowned at the woman who was looking down at her, tired eyes surveying up and down her body. Masako was not nervous, she changed naked in the locker room, and at least now she had her clothes on.

"You think you're fa—" The woman began.

"This is none of our business Matsumoto, get inside" The boy said with a sense of authority. The woman, who Masako assumed was Matsumoto, unless the boy had an imaginary friend, pouted at him.

"Demo Taicho" Masako and Shinju looked at the two weirdly, the same thoughts running through their head. Taicho? Who the hell calls a little boy captain? Shinju sweat dropped and awkwardly shifted her feet, nearing to Masako. Masako noticed and sighed at Shinju's stupidity in bringing other people into their affairs. She just couldn't keep her big mouth shut. Masako winked at Shinju, who grimaced.

"Lets go" The boy headed inside the house and Matsumoto followed obediently. When the door clicked shut, Masako began to giggle uncontrollably. Shinju looked at her with anger in her eyes.

"Sako-chan, you were just joking weren't you? You don't think you're fat?" She grabbed Masako's arm, who just looked at her and laughed more, tears spilling down her cheeks. She wiped her eyes and sighed.

"Hai Taicho" Shinju stifled a giggle and instead ran ahead of Masako while she was retrieving her bag. Masako grinned and followed, catching up to her easily.

They sat in the school yard, eating their breakfast which consisted of granola bars, water, and an orange. Healthy and filling is what Masako called it.

The pair were always the earliest to school, even before the teachers. It gave them time to change into the uniform, do the homework they missed, and sometimes take a nap. But because of today's hold-up, the janitor was there earlier and let them into the school after they finished eating.

Masako and Shinju ran in the halls yelling, hearing the echoes vibrate through the walls of the school. Their laughter's reverberated and filled their ears, causing both of them to have migraines.

Shinju sat on the tile floor and smiled at Masako who was standing, watching the rooms starting to fill. "It would be a great day" Masako thought.

* * *

Shinju sat in the middle of the second row and Masako sat in the middle of the third row. Masako was closest to the window and was often grateful that she was able to gaze at the outside world and lose herself to the beauty of it. Masako was often called a "dreamer" where as Shinju lived in the present. She couldn't help it, her mind would wonder to another place and the whole world would just seem to disappear. It got her in trouble at times, teachers would think that she was slacking off and they would threaten to take away her privilege to participate in extra curricular activities, which meant "no more track". But she didn't worry about it much; the school would never win the track competitions without her. 

"Alright kids, we have a new student in our class, please welcome him" Masako looked up at Chiro-sensei weirdly. She seemed very nervous. As Masako looked around the room, almost everyone was. She caught Shinju's gaze who also seemed to notice that.

_Masako's P.O.V._

Everyone was acting weird. I heard the door open and saw the kid from this morning, the one with the woman. What was her name again…Matsu…something. He particularly looked bored, his hands were stuffed in his pockets and he was dressed in the school uniform. But the strange thing was, even though he looked bored to death, he stood straight, which seemed like an odd combination. I gazed at the seat next to me and grimaced, it was empty. Please don't sit next to me; you and that lady are creepy.

"Yamagata-san come to the front and introduce yourself to your new classmate" I got up from my seat and trudged to the front of the room. I saw Shinju staring at me and winked at her, she knew what I was planning.

I stood in front of the boy, bowed and said.

"Konichiwa Taicho." I smirked inwardly. "Me llamo Yamagata Masako. Et toi?" I took two foreign language courses extra in hopes of going to a college in America. It was a little joke I liked to play on new students. I loved to see their confused face. But this kid just looked at me uninterestingly and said.

"Hitsugaya Toushirou" And then just walked passed me to the seat next to mine. I was left in the front of the room looking like an idiot, completely dumbfounded. I could hear the class's laughter and I felt my face turn hot. Humiliation spread through my body so quickly, the only thing I could do was go to my seat, avoid everyone's stare and loose myself in my dream world.

My eyes were focused on the school yard the entire time. I heard shifting of seats and realized that school was over. Shinju was standing by my desk with a worried expression.

"Daijobou?" I nodded absently and gathered my things, walking out the door not bothering to wait. That stupid kid. I felt the urge to stab him with my pencil. He probably thinks he's so cool, telling off a popular student in school, I'll show him.

_End P.O.V_

Masako exited the school with her head down and arms balled into fists at her sides. She was walking in a fast pace, Shinju trailing behind her in a panic. It was just like her to block out any one that was trying to help and understand her.

The sun was beginning to set, and yet Masako was still fuming with Shinju finally beside her.

"Come on Sako-chan, we have to go home before its late" Masako stared on ahead, ignoring her friend.

"Sako-chan I'm going home" Masako finally looked at Shinju with heated eyes. Her face was flushed with anger and her hair was sticking onto her face, it was then that Shinju realized that there were tears streaming down her face.

"DON'T YOU REALIZE HOW HE HUMILIATED ME? HE MADE ME LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT IN FRONT OF EVERYONE" Masako grabbed Shinju's shoulders and shook her hard; until she heard the girl's teeth chatter. Shinju felt tears brim her eyes.

Shinju was silent, not having anything to say. It wasn't going to make Masako feel better, so why bother try. Masako was just too hard headed.

Masako stared at Shinju long and hard before storming off, throwing her book bag over her shoulder. Shinju walked a few yards behind her; they always took the same route home.

It was dark and Masako began to slow down and eventually stopped at the park. She knew that Shinju was behind her the whole time, and she began to feel bad, it wasn't her fault.

"Shinju, I'm sorry" Masako turned around and saw no one. A cold wind rippled through her clothes and a shiver ran down her spine.

"Where did you go?" Masako scram while her eyes darted around the park. She dropped her bad beside the swings and wandered through the park, looking for any trace of her. It was late, and not safe, but Masako couldn't have cared less, her friend was missing. She folded her arms across her chest and bit her lip. It was a nervous habit of hers. All the anger from this afternoon was long gone and was replaced with worry. _How could I be so mean?_

_Masako's P.O.V._

The moment I heard the piercing scream, I knew it was Shinju. It vibrated through the wind and echoed. I ran to the source as fast as my little legs could take me.

I didn't see her anywhere, but I heard the screams and I felt my whole body shake. My palms were sweaty and my brain pounded as I stood in the middle of the park, looking for her.

She needed help, and I didn't know where she was. That's when it began.

There was a loud tearing sound, and I felt like I was going to vomit. I couldn't speak, I couldn't even scream for help. I wanted to, so badly, but it wouldn't come out.

The tearing continued, like she was being ripped apart limb by limb. The screaming had stopped, and it was quiet.

I was huddled into myself, clinging to myself for dear life. Tears streamed down my face, but I didn't know why. I mean, Shinju could still be alive, she might not be dead. I'm a kid, what do I know.

I lifted my head after what seemed like hours and looked straight into turquoise eyes. I was about to scream, but everything turned black.

* * *

And now here I was. Sitting in my dark room, my tears dried out. Shinju was dead, I didn't need to call her parents to ask if she was home, I didn't need to walk to her house and wait for her to come out, all of that was over. 

My throat swelled and a new wave of tears came over me. By tomorrow, everyone would know and suspicion would lurk the school halls.

I wanted to die. To stop all of this from happening. Or, if I could have a superpower, I would have to power to control time, so I could stop myself from being mean to Shinju.

I laughed weakly at my stupidity. Superpowers. What kind of idiot have I turned out to be?

I wish Shinju was here in my bedroom, sitting on bed and flipping through one of my magazines. She was smarter than me, and brought reality to all of my ranting. She won every fight…well…except for todays, unfortunately.

I flipped off my bed and headed to the bathroom. My face looked like crap and my make-up was smudged. I sighed and cleaned my face, I didn't feel one bit better.

I slipped into my pajamas and laid down on my bed. It smelled like lilacs, my favorite flower.

I inhaled deeply and cried some more. Where did she go? I heard her, I felt like I was right next to her, and yet, I didn't see her. And how did I end up home. Even though it was just a few hours ago, it felt like all a blur. Like none of it really happened and that tomorrow, I would see Shinju with her long brown hair and loose gym clothes and go for a run.

I was tired. My body was overwhelmed with the need to sleep, but my brain felt like it was on caffeine. The screams were in my head, and they would never stop.

But the scary thing is, the screaming isn't what petrified me. It was when they stopped, that I began to freak out. Because when she was screaming, I knew she was alive, but when it stopped, what was I supposed to assume.

I climbed out of bed and went to the bathroom. I swallowed two sleeping pills and laid back down, waiting for sleep to meet me.

It was that moment, I remembered the eyes, the turquoise eyes that stared at me.

* * *

**That's the end of chapter one. By the way, there is a link to a picture of Masako if you want to see it. Tell me what you think, I would like to hear it.**

**Ishhhyness is out!**


	2. act NATURALLY

**oxyMORON**

_This chapter is shorter. Sorry guys. Well I'm sorry for the long wait, but here it is. Read and comment please!_

_Disclaimer- Umm, Please don't sue me. I don't own Bleach, just Masako and Shinju._

* * *

_**Chapter 2**_

**act Naturally**

My eyes burned as I opened them slowing and I could feel the crust on them. I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand and stretched out my limbs. I looked towards the clock. It was 8:30 in the morning. I must have overslept.

I could here voices outside my door, only two that I recognized, my parent's. They were talking fast and I could barely make out any words they were saying.

"How….is she…..when…..missing…..Shinju" My heart stopped for a few seconds when the happenings of last night hit me. It felt like a load of bricks was placed on my shoulder and weighed down my heart.

I heard the door open and quiet footsteps enter the room. I closed my eyes quickly and tried regain control of my breathing. In through the nose and out through the mouth, like how I usually slept.

I felt my mother's soft hands caress my cheek, trail down to my shoulder and nudge it. I kept my eyes close for a second before slowly opening them and groaning.

"Mom..." I just noticed how weak my voice sounded and it bothered me. It didn't have it usual backbite and was instead very small, barely existent.

"Dear" Her voice was silky and cautioned. "Masako, we need to have a talk. Take a quick shower and meet us downstairs. We'll be waiting so don't keep us long."

I nodded and she left them room, but not before sneaking two quick glances behind her back at me. I heard the click of the door and stiffly got out of bed. My limbs felt watery, needing the daily work from running.

"But not today." I whispered. I grabbed a t-shirt, a pair of capris, and the other essentials, before stepping into the bathroom and locking the door. I slipped out of my clothes and stood in the bathtub with the water turned off.

I don't know how long I stood there, staring at my toes that were cold from the marble floor. I finally snapped out of my daze and turned the hot water on high.

It burned at first, the hot water spraying down my back, like little beads of fire. But it numbed after a while, and I hated that. At least when it hurt, I could focus on that instead of… you know.

I quickly washed and rinsed my hair, and scrubbed my body before getting out. I stood in front of the mirror, like I did after every shower, but it seemed different today. I knew I looked like crap, but I didn't care. At all.

I dried myself and slide my clothes on. I took my time, and I wasn't looking forward to talking to anyone in general. Especially my parents.

I walked slowly down the stairs. I first saw my father; his eyes were bloodshot and tired looking. His posture was slumped and his shirt was on inside-out. I would have laughed if I were in a better mood. He was sitting on the kitchen table, beside my mother, where for the first time in my life, I thought she looked so small and fragile. Like she could break any moment.

I had the urge to run into her arms, cry and tell her everything. From the beginning to the end. I choked back a sob and marched somewhat to my parents.

I then saw a man in a police uniform. He was pretty tall, with sunglasses and a dark blue uniform that seemed a bit too tight.

I gulped nervously and sat beside my mom, hands in my lap and eyes never leaving the tiled floor.

I heard the chair scrape on the tiles and looked up to look right into steel gray eyes.

"Your name is Masako, correct?" His voice was low but surprisingly soft.

"Yeah"

"And your best friend. What was her name?"

I answered without thinking. "Shinju"

He leaned back in his chair and drummed his fingers on the table. My parents looked nervous, for what reason, I don't know.

"Do you know where Shinju is?" I almost burst into tears that second. Almost. I bit my lip and shook my head, unable to answer.

His grey eyes narrowed. "You do know that if we find out you're lying, you can be arrested"

His was trying to make me utter false words, which I wasn't going to do.

"I don't know where Shinju is. If I did, I would have told you. Anyway, it's not like her to runaway." My parents seemed to agree because I saw them through the corner of my eye, nodding.

"So what do you suggest happened to her?" I was taken aback, but regained my composure. If he saw the slightest bit of emotion on my face, he would be suspicious and wouldn't leave me alone.

"I don't know" I think the police officer was angry now because his fingers were drumming faster and his face was set in a scowl.

"So what do you know, Masako" I was angry now, and so was my father.

"If you are going to question my daughter, treat her with the respect she deserves" My father's voice was stern and the police officer seemed to get the hint. He got up from the chair and placed a card on the table in front of me.

"That is my business card. Call me if you have any information concerning Miss. Sato." He left the house, closing the door behind him. I heard his car start up and leave.

_Daisuke Kondo_

_Chief Investigator_

_Telephone- (123)456-7891_

"What a loser" I muttered but my mom must have heard because she was glaring at me with her dark brown eyes.

"Masako, we know you're hiding something." My face remained passive. "Tell us"

I stood up and headed out of the room, ignoring my parents shouts. My foot was out of the door before my father grabbed my shoulder. I turned around and felt my façade falter at his expression. He looked so worried. But I merely shrugged off his hand and walked out of my house.

It was particularly humid today, but the winds were cool and blew my hair out of my face.

I didn't run, I couldn't. It just didn't feel right. And every time I felt my pace quicken, I would stop and walk slowly again, being careful. Running was something I did with Shinju and Shinju only.

I walked all over Karakura, unconsciously avoiding the park. I had no money on me, so my growling stomach would have to wait till later.

I stopped at a hill and sat down, watching the sunset. It was so weird how fast the day passed by. I bet my parents are angry, oh well.

"I remember you" I turned around to face that woman I met two days ago. The lady with crystal blue eyes and strawberry blonde hair whose chest seemed a bit oversized and made me feel puny. She was in a mini skirt that was too mini and I skin tight blue shirt that made her eyes pop out.

She sat beside me with a huge smile on her face. Her eyes were on my face, like her baby blue's were reading my every emotion, like she could see what was not there, and I was suddenly very alert.

"So… you go to middle school?"

"Yeah"

"What grade?"

"Eighth"

"You like it?"

"Sure"

"Can you speak more than one word?"

I was ticked off by this. I wasn't the one who came up to a stranger and started asking questions when she should mind her own business. And that's what I told her.

She looked taken aback for a second before getting up and leaving, but then I got this strange thought.

"Why didn't you ask me about Shinju?"

"Who?" I grimaced.

"Don't play games with me, the girl that was with me the other day"

She only frowned and kept on walking, not looking back even once.

* * *

I thought about that encounter the whole way home. Why didn't she answer me? Did she know? No, Masako that's ridiculous, no one knows.

It was dark out and I could see my house not too far away. It was the only one that still had the lights on, which seemed strange. It was only eight o'clock, how early do people sleep these days?

I opened the door quietly, keeping my head low, and hurried up the stairs, feeling my parents glare at my back. I closed the door in my room and dropped into bed with sticky clothes on.

My head hurt, it was all too much. I curled into myself and sighed, trying to clear what was left of my mind.

I think that by the time I remembered those turquoise eyes that stared at me that eventful day, it was 1 am in the morning. I couldn't sleep and I was afraid that if I took sleeping pills again, I would become addicted.

What is it a guy's eyes, or girls? No definitely guy's eyes. They were slanted and more almond shaped. And the color? It was simply the most gorgeous color of eyes I have ever seen. I don't even think "turquoise" really tells how beautiful they were.

I got up from bed and sat at my desk. I shuffled through my papers before finding a clean sheet and a pencil. My hand moved around the sheet looking for a place to start, and choosing the far right.

I lightly drew lines, randomly doodling. It was a half an hour later, I felt my heart beating faster and my skin was sweaty. I looked at my paper and saw it was a picture of a swing. Just like the one at the playground.

Breathe in, breathe out Masako. I had to concentrate on breathing, or I might have fainted and that wouldn't be pretty. I ripped the paper and threw it in the trash, my heart feeling lighter. It was like I had just had a panic attack. I think I did.

I opened the window and almost choked on my own spit at what I saw. Right in front of me, in the house next to ours, was a kid in some kind of robe-thingy, standing on the roof. What the hell is he, crazy?

"Hey" I yelled. I know it was stupid. It was 1:30 in the morning and people needed their sleep. But come on, this was an emergency. The kid didn't turn though.

"Hey you, the kid standing on the roof!" He must have heard because the person turned and looked at me. I couldn't see much of the person's face, it was dark and the only source of light was the moon. But I could see the white hair he had. Spiky and in a disarray.

"You should get down from there, you might—"My voice trailed off as the kid disappeared. Just like that.

Was I hallucinating? I must really need some sleep; I'm starting to see things.

I just didn't feel sleepy, but my body was tired, and I was angry about that. Stupid person.

Okay, there are many things a person could do to fall asleep. Counting sheep.

_One sheep, two sheep, three sheep…hehe sheep are cute. They're all fluffy and white. Oh God, what the hell is wrong with me. Crap._

Listening to music. I pressed the play button on my iPod, which was on shuffle.

_I walked across an empty land,  
I knew the pathway like the back of my hand.  
I felt the earth beneath my feet,  
Sat by the river and it made me complete.  
Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?  
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on.  
So tell me when you're gonna let me in,  
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin._

I felt tears well up in the corners of my eyes. No wonder I don't listen to Keane that much. It's depressing.

Warm milk. I tippy-toed down the staircase and went into the kitchen and turned on the light. The sudden brightness hurt my eyes and for a second, I kept them closed. I walked over to the fridge and took out the milk. I looked through the cabinets and found a kettle and a cup. I poured some of it into the kettle and out it on the burner. I sat on the counter waiting, and was relieved that I hadn't warmed the milk too much. I drank it in one gulp, but felt no effects.

I closed the lights and went back upstairs, so freaking tired of everything. I sat on my bed and lowered myself into the blankets, plopping my head on the cold side of the pillow. And then I thought of the turquoise eyes. And before you know it, I was asleep.

* * *

**That's the end of chapter 2. Review Please!**

**Ishhhyness is out**


	3. alone TOGETHER

**Chapter 3**

**alone Together**

_**I**__ am really starting to love these oxymorons. Funny thing about the summary, that a person, my friend, actually told me I was a living oxymoron, and I thought that sounded really cool. So it was sort of inspiration. Anyway, here it goes._

_Disclaimer- Don't own Bleach._

* * *

It was probably weird to hear that when I thought of those turquoise eyes, I fell asleep, but that's what happened. And this morning I woke up at five and was ready by six to leave to school.

Instead, I sat at the table and munched on a chocolate chip muffin, high on calories, and I couldn't care less. My legs were propped on the table and looked so skinny. I put down the muffin and glared at my legs in different angles.

"Chicken legs, ew" I finished the muffin in one bite and got up, grabbing my book bag and leaving the house, without saying goodbye to my parents.

My dad would have to leave soon, back to America, but he was trying to postpone that due to the sudden "tragedy". His attempt to comfort me was ridiculous and put to waste.

I walked in a slow pace, it was cold and I had forgotten to wear a sweater over my uniform. The hairs on my arms stood up, and the thin fabric of the shirt didn't do much to keep me warm.

If I were to run, I knew I would be warmer, maybe even hot, but I couldn't do it. My legs stayed at a slow pace, trapped even.

I arrived at school ten minutes early, and I watched as teachers rushed into the school with tea at hand and a briefcase in the other. It was strange, to see them so hectic before school, and the moment they enter the classroom, they have this cool demeanor about them. Actually, it was pretty pathetic.

I entered the classroom five minutes late, much to my own confusion, and went directly to my seat, avoiding the pitiful stares of my classmates.

They all knew. And now they would feel sorry for me.

That's disgusting. I don't need people to pity me.

I took out my notebook and started to doodle all over my page, ignoring the teacher's lecture. I honestly didn't care at the moment, and only came to school because I had to; it was against the law not to.

I felt a stare boring into the side of my head and turned to see the new kid, looking out the window. I looked around the room, trying to look for those eyes, but found that everyone was looking at the teacher.

_Was I seriously crazy? _No, I KNOW someone was staring at me.

My eyes wandered back to my book, and for the rest of the class period, I was paranoid.

* * *

Lunch was probably the worst part of the day.

First of all, I forgot to pack lunch. I had no money, so I couldn't buy lunch.

Second, I was completely lost. Shinju and I usually sat on the bleachers outside, overlooking the track field, but it didn't seem right to go over there by myself. I stood in the middle of the cafeteria looking like a complete idiot.

Third, I was all alone. Physically, no of course not. There were a hundred kids surrounding me. But in my mind and heart, which felt like it had been hollowed out, I was secluded.

I walked out of the cafeteria and into the hallway. It was deafly quiet, and you could hear the sounds my sneakers made as I stomped down the hall and up the stairs. I needed to get away, from everything and everyone.

I reached the roof and opened the door. It was a bit rusty, due to the massive amount of rain days this year, but was still able to be opened.

**_You're something beautiful  
a contradiction_**

"Umm…hey" I had the worst luck, ever. I went on the roof to be alone, and found the new kid already there. He kept his back to me, which I found pretty annoying. I mean, I said "hi" to him, he could at least return the greetings.

His white hair looked so... pretty, but in a guyish way. It was all spiky and …. Oh my god. My hallucination. I was hallucinating about the new kid?

Frick.

"New kid?" He turned around and I froze. Those eyes with the color that has no name. It was his eyes?

He looked agitated, his tan face scrunched and eyebrows furrowed. Though, it looked like he finally recognized me and his face was calm.

"Is there something you need?" Yes, my best friend and … money for lunch. Oh, and my life back to the way it is. But other than that, nope, I'm perfectly fine.

Of course I didn't say that. But I wanted to.

"No, I don't need anything" He turned his back at me, satisfied with my answer.

"But" I heard him sigh and get up, heading for the door.

"NO" I screamed without thinking. He looked surprised. I was speechless for a second and only the flurry of the wind could be heard.

"You don't have to leave. I was just going to go" My footsteps were quick and hurried; I tripped on my own feet and hit my head on the door. I could feel the bump rising on my head.

_**You're the queen of the superficial  
and how long before you tell the truth?** _

"I'm alright, I'm alright" I muttered. It's not like it mattered; he stood away from me, stuck in his spot.

And then I remembered why I didn't like him. I mean, I shouldn't have a reason to, I had just met him. But there was this air about him that made me feel like I was beneath him. The way he looked at me, made me feel so small, even though, technically I was small.

I just felt nervous around him, like my whole body was telling me to run away from him, to get away as fast as you can. Something isn't normal about him, run…

But I wasn't going to run. I had stopped, and before long, I wouldn't even be as fast as I was before. I wouldn't be able to … fly.

That was the saddest part. Next to the fact that Shinju had disappeared, I wouldn't be able to fly anymore. To have that airy feeling spreading through your body as you ran, freeing yourself from the world.

And I realized all of this as I sat on the hard gravel ground, clutching my head in pain and rocking back and forth, looking quite like a maniac. I think the term used is I was having a "mental breakdown"

Yes, I was breaking down mentally. My brain and body couldn't take anymore of this abuse; it was all too much for one person. Especially me, a selfish teen who only thought about herself.

I was alert of him nearing me and I looked up to see him walk past me and out the door, cool and smooth.

"Thanks for the help"

Idiot.

I leaned my head onto the metal door, feeling the coolness bring the pain down a bit. It felt nice, and was oddly calming.

I attempted to get up, but fell back on the floor the second the door opened and hit my head again. My head was hurt twice in a day, that's not a good sign.

I moaned and clutched my head, looking up to see the new kid with a glass of water in one hand and a pill in the other.

He didn't seem fazed by the fact that I was hit on the head again, instead kneeling in front of me, causing my eyes to look directly into his.

This isn't fair.

He grabbed my hand from my head, putting the pill on the middle of my palm and placed the glass of water on the floor.

I looked up at him, confused.

"Hitsugaya Toushirou"

"Oh" He must have been annoyed about the fact I called him new kid.

"Take the pill, it's for your headache, and get up out of the way of the door. By the looks of it, the next time your hit, you'll have a concussion."

I nodded solemnly, then swallowed the pill, finishing the glass of water in one gulp.

"Masako Yamagata" He pulled me to my feet, leaving a great amount of space between us, which I was thankful for.

"I know who you are" He stood in front of me, hands deep in his pockets, just like the first day.

There was an awkward silence between us, but my headache was going down, and I felt much better than before. Although he didn't seem to be aware of the silence, since he took out his cell phone and started to play with it.

**_Can you see that I am needing  
Begging for so much more  
Than you could ever give_**

The sound of the bell knocked me out of my day dreams. I was going to leave when I saw that the new kid, Toushirou, hadn't moved.

"Lunch is over, we have to get back to class" He looked up at me, his face apathetic.

"Go ahead, I'll go down when I want to" I smirked.

"Oh, so you're the rebel type. The kind of guy who does what he wants when he wants." I walked up to Toushirou and took a seat beside him, glancing at his phone.

It looked like he was so absorbed into it; I wanted to know what was so interesting about it.

"No, I'm not. Go to class."

"You're being a hypocrite. Telling me to do something when you aren't"

He looked officially annoyed and scooted away from me.

"I know what hypocrite means. Just do what you're told."

"Last time I checked, you weren't my father, so I don't think you can tell me what to do. Plus, we are the same age, so don't pull that 'respect your elders' bull. Well, you might be older than me, by months, but since I don't know when your birthday is, I assume we are the same age."

I was on a roll. The words just came out of my mouth so naturally, I didn't even have to think about it.

"Fine" He shut his phone and put in his pocket, getting up from beside me and patting the dirt off his pants.

His pace was quick as we walked down the stairs and into the halls. He then took the wrong turn walking towards the "High school" area of the school.

"You're going the wrong way" I whispered following him. He merely waved his hand, shutting me up.

He led me to a deserted classroom, where only a few teenagers resided, one of them I recognized as the busty lady who called him captain.

"Taicho?" There were two other girls in the room. One had orange hair and brown eyes with a graceful smile on her face. The other had black hair and indigo eyes and she looked at me with cat eyes. "What are you doing here, isn't your lunch time over?"

Toushirou grimaced and sat down on a desk, pulling out his cell phone.

"Umm..." The attention moved directly to me. "My name is Yamagata Masako; it's nice to meet you." I sounded unsure, and they must have noticed.

"We've already met" Busty woman grinned. "My name is Matsumoto Rangiku"

"Orihime Inoue"

"Kuchiki Rukia"

My stomach growled and I blushed furiously. Toushirou looked up at me and smirked.

"Would you like some of my bento?" Orihime said it in a motherly soft voice. I was so embarrassed. I waved my hands in the air, my face hot.

"No no no" I clenched my teeth together, but she insisted, placing it in my hands.

"It's really good. I made it myself"

I put it on a desk immediately and walked quickly out of the room. I heard footsteps follow me, but kept on walking not bothering to stop.

I was at the junior high part of the school when I felt a hand on my shoulder, turning me around. It was the girl with the cat eyes, Rukia.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" I blushed.

"I know, my stomach was so loud. I should have eaten something." She shook her head.

"You shouldn't have run off—"

"I didn't run" She stopped and looked at me, confused.

"What?"

"I didn't run. I know what is running, and that wasn't it."

"Fine" She rolled her eyes. "You shouldn't have left, even if you were embarrassed. Orihime probably thinks it's her fault that you left. That her cooking repelled you."

"WHAT" I bit my lip. "It wasn't her fault, it's me. I really should go, tell her I'm sorry"

And I left like that. She didn't follow me, and didn't stop me. I was left in the halls, alone.

**_I think I'm drowning_**

_**Asphyxiated**_

* * *

That's the end of chapter three. The lyrics are from Muse songs. They go in this order:

-Time is running out

-Supermassive Black Hole

-Muscle Museum

-Then it is Time is running out again

Please review!

**Ishhhyness is out**


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